I am woman hear me whine, worry, fret...

Being a woman is so challenging sometimes. Okay, a lot of the time. Why is it that we worry about so much?!? It seems like men don't have a care in the world.

Remember the beginning stages of dating or a crush?? We sit there thinking, "are they going to call," "should I call," " does he even like me," "oh, my god my stomach!!" Then with all that worrying and fretting you find out later that he was sitting there the whole time eating cheetos and playing video games not even thinking!!! And we always think the same thing, "all the worrying for nothing!"

We worry about our appearance. How many of you take days to decide what hairstyle or color to get before you make that big move?? I know that I do. And then when I get there I am still unsure and have to have a support person with me and the stylist to assure me that "it will look great with my face shape." We worry about calories and how much weight we put on. We worry about wearing brown and black together and take notice of those who do. We put gobs of make-up on to cover up the skin that we are so trying to keep moisturized and wrinkle free. Do guys do this??? Nope. Not straight ones anyway...

We worry about if the food that we make tastes good... questioning others with that wild look in our eyes. We worry about that bump in the night... murderer?? Most likely. We worry about making people upset, angry, mad, or sad. We don't like to fire people or criticize others.

On the other hand...

Women worry about that elderly person who may have no family at the holidays. We worry about the dinners of someone who just lost a loved ones. We go out of our way to help children who seem lost in stores. We wave that person on ahead in traffic. If I have a cart full of groceries and someone behind me has less, then I always let them go first. Our hearts go out to those in distress and we weep for them. I know that I wait on people who are older or disabled even though I'm just a patron myself. We care about the situations of our friends and family... calling and checking on them.

Women worry and whine, but we also love and care. That balances out. Right??

Finding Myself

Just a girl...

I've been thinking about the things that really define me lately. Who am I?? I seem to have lost myself somewhere over the past few years and am desperately trying to find that person again. I'm pretty sure that I know where, why, how, and when the "real" April was lost, but now I have to search...

Pretty sure the "real" April....

*doesn't take crap from anyone, stands up for herself & others, and has a backbone.
*is grouchy when she's tired. Get over it.
*is able to manage her life, finances, emotions, and relationships.
*has opinions. They may not be the majority, may not be right in sync with what conservatives believe, and may be expressed periodically on a soapbox when no one really cares.
*loves Jesus, but doesn't cram it down others throats.
*is respectful, tolerant, and loving toward those who are different or believe differently.
*loves being a girl. Big sunglasses, hair appointments, nails, and make-up. It's me, okay?? Plain just doesn't work for me.
*likes to read, write, think, learn.
*enjoys being by herself sometimes and enjoys even more not talking at all sometimes.
*likes to hang out with her family & friends.
*loves to drink a pina colada every now and then.
*hates conflict, but isn't afraid to face-off with it.
*loves the thrill, smell, and overall feel of late night dirt track racing.
*likes to go see new places, but is terrified of a bridge.
*is not always right. In fact, can be very wrong sometimes.
*loves movies. All movies (except sci-fi geeky ones)! She loves to be scared to the point of peeking through her fingers through an entire horror movie. She loves to laugh out loud at a raunchy comedy. She loves to try to figure out the plot of action/thrillers. And she loves to cry during a sad chick flick.
*loves to take care of people.

So... if anyone sees this girl out there somewhere, then please let me know. I've caught a few glances of her lately and really just need her back!

Muah
April

Amber... the story of us

If you see my facebook, then you see me often going back and forth with someone named Amber. If you've ever wondered, "who the heck is that," now is the time when you will find out...

Amber is my "little" cousin who has been taller than me most of my life. I think she was born about 2 feet tall =) We've been through so much together... good times, bad times, and just plain times!! Amber grew up just like one of my sisters- her name started with an "A," so that made her fit in even more. The only problem was that she was blonde and we are all very much brunettes. As an only child she sometimes had some issues with sharing, but I've never been one to listen when someone tells me to "not touch that."

We have so many memories...

Once we narrowly escaped death by foolishly finding an old rope in the barn (probably 100 years old) and tying it through the holes in a cinder block and trying to pull the block up through the loft trap door. Well, about half way up the rope broke and the block fell through the barn floor and there was a huge hole in the floor. Our little "clubhouse" was in that loft. Once we stayed all night there... all of us. Some hideous things happened with some dorito can (yes, Doritos came in a can then). We were terrified and just pretty much huddled together until morning... I don't even know why we did that!!

We were always so inventive. One night we really wanted to play football. Sounds reasonable except that we had no football. Using some heavy duty masking tape, we transformed a roll of toilet paper into the best football one could ever imagine... or so we thought. We invented trampoline tag. The trampoline was the base and you had to be jumping on it to be safe. Lemme just say that it is not easy to run full force at a trampoline and jump on it without bruising your legs up something awful. Especially when you were my heigth. We would play hardware store (what girls play hardware store?). She made me spit sprite all over the kitchen once... because I was laughing so hard.

She was at every birthday party, holiday, and Sunday dinner throughout my whole childhood. We competed in cheesecake photo shoots, California Raisin karaoke, and Easter Egg Hunts. We held seances, told scary stories, mated socks, and watched MAD TV often. We made up dances... Rumpshaker & Baby Got Back. She would make friends with our friends and was always nice to them all. It seems as if we were always mean to hers... I have no idea why!!

There was once an "incident" involving chexmix. It was the scandal of the century. I think she got beat over that one! Well, I'll just admit it: I bamboozled her and Ashley. You see... I convinced them to go hide and eat all the white chex so that Alicia couldn't have any. I then said that I had to go to the bathroom, but instead went and told our moms what they were "up to." They were caught red-handed and Alicia and I enjoyed the "ice" ourselves!! LOL!! Omgosh. They are still mad about that little thing to this day!

When I stayed the night with her I'd read Berenstein books all night long and make fun of her because she thought her doll, Patty, was her little sister. She had a troll collection out of this world. When she stayed the night we'd play games. Once when we played Sorry- we kept sending her back to start. She cried and said, "you always make me be yellow!" We got in trouble, but we've never let her live it down!! I seemed to always do "mean" things... maybe I was a mean kid- I dunno. I made fun of her boyfriends- "Old Cheese." lol She once said "chickmunk" and "cheycain" and she's been teased ever since.

I'd make her call boys for me. I'd make her set me up with boys. I was a little boy crazy!! She was a bridesmaid in my first wedding. Sorry that the best man in hers was a scuzz. We'd spend lots of our summers together- swimming, going to parks, and just having a ball. We were the biggest KNOTB fans alive and we'd parade up and down her street in our gear. We'd make videos of ourselves- The Courtney Pond Show (trying to be like the Ricki Lake show)- My Cousin is a Slut. Bahahahaha. We made her and Shelley dress up in slutty clothes and lots of make-up and Ashley dressed like this little Pentecostal girl. It was so hilarious. Those were the best days ever!!!

Well, I love her just like one of my sisters. I was just as mean to them as I was to her. She's always been one of my best friends. Loyal- to a fault. Follower- to a fault. She is amazing. So smart!! I was just trying to "toughen" her up all those years so that she'd know the joy of having siblings. Anyway, I will always tease her. It's just part of life, but I do love her so much!! I thought I'd let everyone know that we don't really hate each other, but actually are like sisters!!

Love you Remba!!

Love-

Lirpa Nwad

dislike!

Yesterday I enlightened everyone on the loves of my life... today- the unloves. The hates. The stay-away-from-me's.


1. Creepy guys in gold chains that call me "babe." Seriously, I was born after the 70's and you may want to try branching out from them (and your family tree), as well.

2. Mice. Wish they would all DIE. Their mere existance on this earth make me queasy beyond belief. I HATE them. All of them... yes, even Stuart Little. Most people may think that Hostel was scary-- ha ha-- they obviously haven't seen "Mouse Hunt" which is the worst horror movie that I've ever layed eyes upon!!

3. Bridges. They scare me to death. TO DEATH. Not lying...

4. People who think they know/understand EVERYTHING! Okay, I'm not going to lie, I am pretty smart and I can usually deduce things if I'm unsure, but I never pretend to know something. That is so retarded. That is the reason for the chicken/steak joke. If you've not been privy to this hilarious joke, then please ask me to tell you sometime. Either you'll laugh or I will or we both will. hmmm.

5. The Nanny. That woman should be smacked around until her voice turns to normal. Oh, my gosh Fran Dreischer... I do not like you or your nasal tone.

6. Tomatoes. Who the heck invented these water balls?? They are so nasty. I tell people that I'm allergic so that they'll remember to NOT put them on my food!! gag.

7. Happy people in the morning. Shut up. Please. Before the sun comes up is not a time for laughter or smiling or even talking... so... shut it!!

8. Girls who throw "like girls." If you can't throw, then don't. It's not cute. It makes you look like an idiot and we all laugh at you behind your back. QUIT IT!

9. Guys who sag their pants. Pull them up! I don't want to see your boxers... or the lack of anything in them for that matter!! If you're wearing a belt- usually you are-- you are obviously unaware of what a belt is actually for. Look it up. Use it. Live it. Love it.

10. Television preachers. I've called them. I've questioned them. I've challenged them about where my money would go if I did send them some in exchange for a "green handkerchief" that would bring me $50,000 in a few days. They had no answer. They told me not to worry about where God's money goes. Realllly?? bahahahahaha. Then don't worry about where my money goes- crooks!

11. Tornadoes. I could so do without these. I do love rain, but hate big storms...

12. Science fiction movies/books/etc... They are DUMB! Not realistic. Not entertaining. I'm not going to sit through one. I apologize ahead of time, but if you like Star Wars, then you, my friend, are a geek.

That would be my ranting... don't worry I have lots more dislikes, but I may offend someone.

*April*

Welcome Feb!

Ahhh... February... the month of l-o-v-e... LOVE.

In honor of this red & pink month I'd thought I'd share some of my loves with all of you....

1. penguins. I want one. BAD. If you steal me one from the zoo, then I'll add your name to this list.



2. facebook. OMGOSH. Can't live without it. It's sad really... I am an addict. fo sho.



3. mountain dew. No matter how many kidney stones that I painfully suffer through or how many kidney surgeries that I have to endure... I will never leave you, mountain dew. NEVER!



4. paul poteet. My forever weatherman. Channel 6 can take him away, but he will always live in my heart... sniff.



5. rain. It's just awesome. okay??



6. coconut m&m's. I swear if Mars pulls these from the shelves one more time- I'm going to sue.



7. wal-mart. I love you because you produce so many laughs as I view your patrons.



8. mortuary science. I can't wait to embalm me some bodies...



9. chris farley. We were going to get married... no, seriously.



10. lying. Gullible people are hilarious... love it.



11. chi iron. it's my favorite. it's pink. that makes it better.



12. And last, but not least... Ghetto Cowboy. will.forever.live.in.my.heart.

The End

April

Upcoming challenge...

In order to "expand our territories" in all areas of life, our Church is going to start a sort of togetherness fasting. No, we are not fasting food... no, we are not fasting mountain dew... no, we are not fasting laborious activity!! We are going to go 7 whole, long (very long) days without television, movies, OR internet!! We have other fastings that follow this week, but I am just floored with this particular one. Why?? Television and the internet consume most of my life.

I am a facebook addict. I love blogging. I check the local news and weather hourly. I love to read "textsfromlastnight.com," "peopleofwalmart.com," and any other funny site that someone recommends. I do my banking online. I am enrolled in an online class (we are allowed to use the internet for work and school). I get recipes, e-mail, catch up on shows that I've missed, scour ebay and craigslist, and read celebrity gossip!! I am even in an online Bible Study!!

I watch Forensic Files nightly, the morning news daily, and any episode of Roseanne, The Office, or Seinfeld that I can catch. ICarly, Hannah Montana, and Wizards of Waverly Place are often playing on my television. What is a Saturday night without Lock-up: Raw??

It is scary to me how much I rely on these things that are truly not necessary for survival. I do need to go a week without them to focus on God and to show myself that I can live without the keyboard and remote!! He is so much more important to me than these worldly things... right?!? Then why did my heart skip a beat when the Pastor threw out this challenge???? I need to get back on the level that I need to be on with my GOD!! HE gave his LIFE for me... I think that I can give up a little ebay and Icarly for a week!!!

I hope... gulp.

~April

I will...

It's a new year: 2010

The thirtieth year of my life...


A year that I am choosing to be optimistic about...


A year that I am letting God be my guide...


A year that will be amazing!!

This year I plan on being more involved, active, and taking initiative when it comes to my spiritual walk. I can see that life does go by so quickly and often our lives are shortened too soon. I want to know that I will forever be with my Jesus when my time on this Earth is through.

This year will bring a hope and dedication to my financial plan. I will trust in God and be the best that I can be when it comes to budgeting and paying bills.

I plan to be more attentive to myself: do my hair, wear make-up, eat healthier, and to learn to love myself. This will be difficult for me, but again, with HIS help I can accomplish anything!

I will excell in school. I will keep my grades up and apply for mortuary school. I will study and try my best at everything that comes my way.

I will strengthen my relationships. I will love my husband more, call my grandparents more, spend more time with my sisters, and let my parents know how important they are to me. I will take time out for friends, have slumber parties with my niece, and hug my in-laws.

I will be a better person, a kinder friend, and a giving individual.

Bless you all in 2010!!

~April